Stephen Harper is on a world tour.
A world tour apparently consists of the US and Europe in the conservative peanut mind and since that is the world, he is touring it.
This confused conservative clown (witty eh? Confused conservative clown or CCC in short, just like reduce, reuse, recycle), is prancing around the globe as though his puny grasp of world events (not that far removed from Bush's) is going to fix any part of this global economic disaster we are in.
You note that he keeps repeating, protectionism is bad, protectionism is bad, protectionism... The reason for this is that, he has no clue what is going on. The galactic vacuity under that helmet hair has not been populated with much for quite some time now.
But hey, where's Jack Layton?
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Monday, March 30, 2009
Attack
I was attacked the other day.
Not physically. I was taken to task for my ability (or lack of it thereof?) to spell. Now, I didn't know that I could not spell but if that is a problem, in my own defence, it's hard to care about such things when Rick Wagoner, the CEO of GM is losing his job.
The fate of Rick Wagoner has truly occupied all of my mind. That, and how to make several billion dollars in a quick.
I have concluded that I am going to start a failed business that employs a lot of people. This revolution in business is going to produce rubbish no one wants to buy. And when the business is about to go under, as it is sure to do (producing the aforementioned rubbish no one wants to buy), I will seek billions of dollars to keep it afloat (presumably to produce more rubbish no one wants to buy).
What's the value in this scheme?
Well, unlike in other businesses, where you have to engage in the bygone (from my point of view anyway) construct of working for your living, this business will be founded on the radical concept of not giving a hoot.
So, the product we develop (if we develop anything at all) will be garbage (though it will have a shiny chrome-like look to it that Americans like). If customers complain, we will spit on them because hey, they owe us a living - we're too big to fail don't you know?
All I need for this plan are lots of employees whom I will use to form the backbone of my 'too-big-to-fail-thus-give-me-37-billion' strategy', and I am on my way.
Not physically. I was taken to task for my ability (or lack of it thereof?) to spell. Now, I didn't know that I could not spell but if that is a problem, in my own defence, it's hard to care about such things when Rick Wagoner, the CEO of GM is losing his job.
The fate of Rick Wagoner has truly occupied all of my mind. That, and how to make several billion dollars in a quick.
I have concluded that I am going to start a failed business that employs a lot of people. This revolution in business is going to produce rubbish no one wants to buy. And when the business is about to go under, as it is sure to do (producing the aforementioned rubbish no one wants to buy), I will seek billions of dollars to keep it afloat (presumably to produce more rubbish no one wants to buy).
What's the value in this scheme?
Well, unlike in other businesses, where you have to engage in the bygone (from my point of view anyway) construct of working for your living, this business will be founded on the radical concept of not giving a hoot.
So, the product we develop (if we develop anything at all) will be garbage (though it will have a shiny chrome-like look to it that Americans like). If customers complain, we will spit on them because hey, they owe us a living - we're too big to fail don't you know?
All I need for this plan are lots of employees whom I will use to form the backbone of my 'too-big-to-fail-thus-give-me-37-billion' strategy', and I am on my way.
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Spotted
Spotted Michael Ignatieff the other day.
He was on TV. I dare say, I am starting to like Michael's style. He presents as poised and unruffled more than Stephane Dion ever was. Moreover, he is taking a thoughtful approach to guiding the Liberal Party forward, which I appreciate.
Of course, the fact that he is no reactionary, narrow-minded and xenophobic Reform Party alumnus adds greatly to his appeal.
When Stephane Dion was elected the leader of the Liberal Party I thought it was a bad compromise and an all round mistake. Stephane Dion is generally recognized as a good man but, as I have argued before, he had difficulty articulating himself and, unlike Jean Chretien, could not counter his debilitating lack of fluency in the English language with charisma, which he also lacked. I felt nothing but dismay when Stepane Dion was elected to head the liberals and the mistake I thought the liberals had made by selecting him as the head of the party, proved to be disastrous at election time.
But seeing Michael Ignatieff over the time he has been elected I am cautiously hopeful for a better future for Canada than it currently has in the hands of Stephen Harper and the likes of Jason Kenney, that odious slug.
He was on TV. I dare say, I am starting to like Michael's style. He presents as poised and unruffled more than Stephane Dion ever was. Moreover, he is taking a thoughtful approach to guiding the Liberal Party forward, which I appreciate.
Of course, the fact that he is no reactionary, narrow-minded and xenophobic Reform Party alumnus adds greatly to his appeal.
When Stephane Dion was elected the leader of the Liberal Party I thought it was a bad compromise and an all round mistake. Stephane Dion is generally recognized as a good man but, as I have argued before, he had difficulty articulating himself and, unlike Jean Chretien, could not counter his debilitating lack of fluency in the English language with charisma, which he also lacked. I felt nothing but dismay when Stepane Dion was elected to head the liberals and the mistake I thought the liberals had made by selecting him as the head of the party, proved to be disastrous at election time.
But seeing Michael Ignatieff over the time he has been elected I am cautiously hopeful for a better future for Canada than it currently has in the hands of Stephen Harper and the likes of Jason Kenney, that odious slug.
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Crack
I was telling my good friend (no, not Caitlyn, that lustrous beauty), who is quite beautiful, that if you go to Afghanistan you can get a folk practitioner to crack your back and neck for a mere 20 cents.
They do an excellent job too these folk practitioners. Along with cracking your back and neck they will give you a bang-up massage, all inclusive.
The only thing is that these folk healers don't go around calling themselves 'doctors' even though they can crack people's necks and backs.
Okay, so my friend is a Chiropractor and she took great offence to what I said.
But, what's her problem anyway?
I did also say to her that maybe the reason she has so many people come to see her is because they, both men and women alike, want her to lie on them - which she has to to crack their backs since she is too petite to do it with sheer brute force of the biceps.
It is also true that I was looking at her rather prominent breasts when I said that to her but still...why get upset?
They do an excellent job too these folk practitioners. Along with cracking your back and neck they will give you a bang-up massage, all inclusive.
The only thing is that these folk healers don't go around calling themselves 'doctors' even though they can crack people's necks and backs.
Okay, so my friend is a Chiropractor and she took great offence to what I said.
But, what's her problem anyway?
I did also say to her that maybe the reason she has so many people come to see her is because they, both men and women alike, want her to lie on them - which she has to to crack their backs since she is too petite to do it with sheer brute force of the biceps.
It is also true that I was looking at her rather prominent breasts when I said that to her but still...why get upset?
Busy
I have been so busy today.
I actually have to go to the bathroom but I cannot leave my office because I am so busy.
Can one actually explode from these things? I mean we often talk about exploding if we don't go, but is there some medical precedence for this kind of thing? I know I wouldn't want to set that precedent in any case so...
I had soup for lunch. A really big bowl. It was very spicy and I enjoyed it but I am afraid it has led to my current predicament.
Anyway...
Where's Michael Ignatieff?
I actually have to go to the bathroom but I cannot leave my office because I am so busy.
Can one actually explode from these things? I mean we often talk about exploding if we don't go, but is there some medical precedence for this kind of thing? I know I wouldn't want to set that precedent in any case so...
I had soup for lunch. A really big bowl. It was very spicy and I enjoyed it but I am afraid it has led to my current predicament.
Anyway...
Where's Michael Ignatieff?
Ho Hum
It's been so dead on the political scene that there has been nothing to blog about.
I have a teeth cleaning scheduled in a month or so, if anyone cares to know.
George Bush was in Calgary I hear and apparently the event was well attended...what can I say, it boggles the mind.
I wonder if the Iraqi journalist who threw his shoes at Bush got his shoes back. I hope he had an extra pair, because if he didn't, in the melee that must have ensued after he lobbed those missiles at Boosh, it would have been hard to have been without shoes. Not that it is easy to be without shoes at any time but, I'm just saying...
What else? Hey, where's Michael Ignatieff?
Oh, one thing new, the conservative party (read narrow-minded party) has decided that it will block future challenges to its incumbents. New rules now require a riding to hold a vote and 2/3rds of the members must vote in favour of a nomination race or the incumbent is automatically proclaimed the party's chosen candidate.
This is democracy people.
Unlike in the real world where you can openly vie for someone's job you cannot do that in the conservative party. The good old white boys club (with a few darkies for special effects) will ensure that your job is well protected.
I have a teeth cleaning scheduled in a month or so, if anyone cares to know.
George Bush was in Calgary I hear and apparently the event was well attended...what can I say, it boggles the mind.
I wonder if the Iraqi journalist who threw his shoes at Bush got his shoes back. I hope he had an extra pair, because if he didn't, in the melee that must have ensued after he lobbed those missiles at Boosh, it would have been hard to have been without shoes. Not that it is easy to be without shoes at any time but, I'm just saying...
What else? Hey, where's Michael Ignatieff?
Oh, one thing new, the conservative party (read narrow-minded party) has decided that it will block future challenges to its incumbents. New rules now require a riding to hold a vote and 2/3rds of the members must vote in favour of a nomination race or the incumbent is automatically proclaimed the party's chosen candidate.
This is democracy people.
Unlike in the real world where you can openly vie for someone's job you cannot do that in the conservative party. The good old white boys club (with a few darkies for special effects) will ensure that your job is well protected.
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Chopped Appendages And All
Ocassionally, the women I date demand of me flowers.
I have a problem with this. I feel that plants are living creatures and since they are, I cannot chop off their limbs, beautiful as they may be, and display them on my dining table to watch the life evaporate from them slowly.
I don't chop off cat limbs and display them on my dining table (though heaven knows cat limbs are as attractive as can be).
I don't chop off bird limbs and display them on my coffee table (despite the fact that I find feathers irresistible).
I have never thought of hacking off my neighbour's dog's limbs to beautify my living room, even if it is to offer my eye a momentary pleasure.
So why would I do this to plants?
But the women in my life, sultry sirens whose sirensong I cannot resist (especially when it is lavished by their lustful bodies), insist I bring them flowers.
Help me here Internet, am I mad?
I have a problem with this. I feel that plants are living creatures and since they are, I cannot chop off their limbs, beautiful as they may be, and display them on my dining table to watch the life evaporate from them slowly.
I don't chop off cat limbs and display them on my dining table (though heaven knows cat limbs are as attractive as can be).
I don't chop off bird limbs and display them on my coffee table (despite the fact that I find feathers irresistible).
I have never thought of hacking off my neighbour's dog's limbs to beautify my living room, even if it is to offer my eye a momentary pleasure.
So why would I do this to plants?
But the women in my life, sultry sirens whose sirensong I cannot resist (especially when it is lavished by their lustful bodies), insist I bring them flowers.
Help me here Internet, am I mad?
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